Control

Court was set to begin at 10am. In the chambers, the justices found breakfast waiting for them when they arrived at 8am. There were hot fresh bagels from Buffalo & Bergen, considered by the cognoscenti to be the best in DC, along with cream cheese and lox. For the gluten-averse there were hard-boiled eggs and a selection of fresh-cut melons and berries. Clarence smiled broadly as he spread a thick schmear on both halves of an everything bagel and took significantly more than a ninth of the salmon. Getting things for free was his favorite perk of the job.

Meanwhile, a bacterial cell was having a conversation with one of the cells in Clarence’s optic nerve.

“Did you see that?” Bac said to Nervi, “The nutrients are about to flow. I love living in this guy.”

“Of course I did. The signal passed right through me. All that carbohydrate and fat are fine for you germs, but us body cells could sure use some of the vitamins and minerals in that fruit he passed up.”

“Hey, watch it!” Bac said. “Don’t use the G-word. It’s disrespectful.”

“Yeah,” Nervi replied, “so says the freeloader whose only function is to eat, sleep and multiply. I’m a part of The Structure.”

“The Structure?” Bac spat back. “What good has The Structure ever done for anyone?”

“Are you serious? We just picked up large quantities of nutrient ore. It’s being ground up in the mouth and then will be sent down to refining so that proteins can be extracted for hull repair and glucose extracted to fuel us all, including your lazy ass who didn’t do any of the work involved. That’s what The Structure does. It helps everybody, whether they deserve it or not.”

“Are you kidding me?” Bac said. “I’ve got all kind of cousins, billions of ‘em, working down in refining. Who do you think does all of the heavy work breaking down the proteins? You might be the ship, but we’re the crew. If it wasn’t for us, this ship would be nothing but a big glob of sugar and fat.”

“Maybe so,” Nervi said, “but you guys are a bad influence. I’ve got a direct line to the gray cells up top and I’ve heard about the insidious ways you guys affect the guidance of the ship.”

“What do you mean ‘insidious?’ It’s a democracy. There’s thirty trillion of you Structure guys and there’s thirty-eight trillion of us. The majority rules.”

“But that’s not fair,” Nervi protested. “Why should almost half of the body have to follow the wishes of a slim majority that we disagree with vehemently?” Bac considered this.

“I tell you what,” Bac said. “As long as The Structure allows us to continue to control food selection, you guys can can guide whatever the hell it is that Clarence does with all those papers and stuff with those other eight vessels.”

“Deal.”

Headline: Conservative Justice’s Dissent Restores Bodily Autonomy to U.S. Women.